Monday, October 26, 2009

"No mommy I not lying"

So yesterday before lunch, I was balancing our finance book while juju and stanky were playing with the rabbit. Out of the corner of my eye, I saw stanky take a toy shovel out of juju's hands...well more like yanked it out of juju's hands. Anyways juju snatches the shovel back and hits stanky with it.

ME: Juju, what did I tell you about hitting your brother?
JUJU: I no hit him mommy.
ME: Juju, I just saw you hit him. Thats called lying and thats bad.
JUJU: No mommy I not lying, I not hit Xa. The shovel hit him.

I had to smile at myself...that smart ass punk lol!

Thursday, October 22, 2009

Memes, And Endorsements, And Zombies- Oh My!

Haven't played in such a long time! Here we go.....(I sure picked a GREAT time to jump right back in lol)

Memes, And Endorsements, And Zombies- Oh My!

1. If you were to start a meme (or a second or third), what would you call it and what day would you pick?
I'm just very good at participating in memes. Ok you twisted my arm lol...let's see...hmmm....I like working out, so I would do: The Friday Five or Five Minute Fridays-->I would like people to post a quick 5 minute workout...something they love doing. Hmmmm....Don't steal my idea! LOL!

2. When a celebrity endorses a product, do you really believe they like it/use it?
Well obviously they LOVE the product...adds to the money vault they have in their homes, that they swim in everyday like Mr. McDuck! Now pron stars...I think they use the products they endorse. I mean damn their made in their likeness and all.

3. Why don't zombies ever just eat each other?
I think they like the thrill of the chase, even though they themselves can't run, or even creep faster than a snail for that matter.

4. If you were an elephant, would you rather roam free or be in a zoo?
I would love to say roam free but then I'd probably be captured by a some poacher or something. So I'd say zoo-->A place to live without fear of being killed, fed on a daily basis, cleaned on a daily basis, and of course these tiny little humans picking up my poop...AWESOME!

5. The doorbell rings on October 31st, do you answer it?
NO! And it better not ring either because my lights are all off and I won't be home.

6. If you see a piece of paper on the ground while out & about, do you pick it up? If so, do you look to see what it is?
I'll pick it up if I see Benjamin's face on it..hell George's for that matter. If it was just a random piece of paper i'd probably still pick it up. It could be someone's dear John letter saying I cheated on u with your best friend's dog or something. It could be someone's worthless invention, that with MY brains could make me tons of money. But yes, I would pick up a piece of paper off the ground if I seen one.

7. If Jon Gosselin and Octomom got married and then their own reality show, do you think she would try to get pregnant again for better ratings?
Octomom again? We're just starting to hear less and less of Jon Gosselin, and now putting them together?! LOL-->She probably would.

8. If Thursday Thunks was to be put on hold or quit completely, would you be sad?
You know what, now that i'm playing again I would be pretty bummed.

Now YOU-->Visit Thursday Thunks and play along too. Its good to be silly at least one day out of the week.

Tuesday, October 20, 2009

Allow me to re-introduce myself

So for a few months now, my posting has been very sparatic. So I thought that since I am wanting to revamp my blog, I would do an about me post...introducing myself and my world (again) to the blog world (my current blog family & hopefully some new bloggy friends).
*Just a warning--its kind of a lengthy post but well worth it I promise*
I am lil mama here in the locker room. I was born & raised in Honolulu, Hawaii. I attended a private catholic school for both elementary & middle school and a private all girls high school. But of course I was THE rebel lol. I was a teenage mom at 16 to a little boy, skinny. He was the light of my life. He taught me how to be a mom, how to love and care for someone else. I grew up.
After I graduated high school as the most boy crazy, I moved to Las Vegas for college. My first year there, I had my second son, milkshake. *As a side note, skinny and milkshake do have the same dad.* I was in college with 2 kids and no man. long as I had my 2 little guys I was perfect. My 3rd year of college I sent my boys back to Hawaii just the year and a half until I graduated. I think I flew home that year like 15 times. I hated being away from them. That was also the year that milkshake was admitted into the hospital for severe dehydration and was diagnosed with Type 1 diabetes. My world felt like it had come to a stand still. I blamed myself, saying that it was because I sent them to Hawaii. (It took me a very long time to believe that it was not punishment for me sending them back home).
The year I graduated from college, the job I was currently at, offered me an opportunity to train and become a manager at another store in Louisiana. At the time, I had been dating a guy (a little over a year) in the air force that was stationed in Louisiana...the exact same city where this job would be. So I packed up and moved.
To make a long story short, it so didn't work out with the dude, and I decided I didn't want to work for that company anymore. I missed my kids and just wanted to go back home. I was managing a hiphop store when in walked my husband, big daddy. Obviously at the time we both had no idea. When I first saw him, there was just something about him--I mean he basically just blew me off lol. I practically fell all over myself talking to him, basically throwing myself at him. His "I'm the shit" attitude was a real turn on lol. At first it was kinda weird, like I was robbing the cradle because he is 4 years younger than me. But since that day we met, we were and still are inseparable (tear lol). After a couple months of "dating" and sleeping over each others' apartments, we decided to move in together. Shortly after moving in together I got pregnant. What were we gonna do? We knew that we would be great parents together, and said we wouldn't just run off and get married because of it either. Unfortunately, I had miscarried about 3 1/2 months along. It was a devastating experience for the both of us. We helped each other grieve, as he took care of me while I was bed-ridden.
Big daddy decided he wanted to buy a house, and thats what he did. He wanted somewhere big enough for my boys to have somewhere to play and hang out. Shortly after moving in to "our" house, big daddy asked me to marry him. That story itself was hilarious, but I'll post about it another time.
We were married in 2005 and knew right away that we wanted to have a family. A month later I got pregnant and that following summer juju was born. Our first child together. Excema covered, he was still big daddy's pride and joy. He was the light of our lives. Skinny and milkshake moved to Louisiana that same summer. They were more than thrilled with their new baby brother, and step-dad. Life was good. We grew together as a family, enjoying every minute. Life was good. There of course were some things to get used to and we did encounter some issues, but we learned and grew stronger. All the men in my life all under one roof...perfect.
The year, well actually the month juju turned one, I got pregnant again. Didn't realize I was pregnant until I was 3 months along. Since I was on birth control, like I was when I miscarried, we were very hesitant to say anything, for fear of another loss. At about 4 1/2 months we figured we were safe, and let the world know that I was with child (I've always wanted to say that lol). I was so sure our little girl was finally here. Pregnancy was so different this time. I was super excited to see, what people said was like a cheeseburger or 3 "dots" in a triangle, on the ultrasound monitor. When the time came big daddy kinda had it in his head we were having a girl too. Saw the heartbeat, and then there it was. I know it was the hormones but I actually did start crying. A penis. I seen it 3 times before. Big daddy even knew as soon as he seen it. My stanky (also referred to as tank). I knew then that my family was finally complete.
Well there you have it. The locker room doesn't always smell good, and its NEVER quiet. We're definitely not your typical family and we definitely are not perfect. We've got lots of wrinkles and kinks, but hey whatever right? It's not always easy being the only girl, but thats my life and as you can tell...its a shitload of fun!

Monday, October 12, 2009

Meme Stealing....Dear Twitter,

So Jenni over at Jiggety Jig stole this meme from someone and now I'm stealing it from her!

Dear twitter,

I don't really know how to tell you this, but I dislike your eyelashes. I realized it when I tripped on peanut butter in a clown suit and I saw you sit on my salt beef bucket. I'm sure you're senile enough to understand that there is no solution to you being a dumbkid. I'm returning your toe ring to you, but i'll keep your glass eye as a memory.

You should also know that I mocked you behind your back constantly and your cucumber fetishism is weird.

Kiss my butt,

LMAO!!! Thanks Jenni, that was super fun. So people get on this and do your own. Then come back and tell me you did so I can read your crazy letter too.

Fill in the Blanks with the choices below....
Dear (friend),
I don't really know how to tell you this, but (1). I think I realized it (2) (3) and I saw you (4) (5). I'm sure you're (6) enough to understand (7). I'm returning (8) to you, but I'll keep (9) as a memory.You should also know that I (10) and (11)
Your Name
1.What's the color of your shirt?
Blue - I'm in love with your cat
Red - Our affair is over
White - I’m joining the Convent
Black -Our romance is over
Green- Our socks don't match
Grey - You're a leprechaun
Yellow - I'm selling myself for candy
Pink - Your nostrils are insulting
Brown - The mafia wants you
No shirt - You're mean
Other -I dislike your eyelashes
2.Which is your birth month?
January - That night you picked your nose
February -When I quoted Forest Gump
March - When your dwarf bit me
April - When I tripped on peanut butter
May - When I threw up in your sock drawer
June - When you put cuffs on me
July – When you smacked my ass
August - When I saw the purple monkey
September - Last year when you peed your pants
October - When we skinny dipped in the bathtub
November - When your dog humped my leg
December - When I finally changed my underwear
3.Which food do you prefer?
Tacos - In your apartment
Lasagna- In your car
Pasta - Outside of your office
Hamburgers - Under the bus
Salad – As you were eating Kraft Dinner
Chicken - In your closet
Kebabs - With Jean Chr├ętien
Fish - In my pajamas
Sandwiches - cAt the Elton John oncert
Pizza - In a clown suit
Hot dog - Under a street light
Annat- With George Bush and Stephen Harper
4.What's the color of your socks?
Yellow - Ignore
Red - Put whipped cream on
Black - Hit on
Blue - Knock out
Purple - Pour syrup on
White - Carve your initials into
Grey - Pull the clothes off
Brown - bit of
Orange - Castrate
Pink - Pull the pants off of
Barefoot - Sit on
Other - Drive over
5.What's the color of your underwear?
Black - My boyfriend
White - My father
Grey – The Catholic Priest
Brown – The Montreal Canadian’s goalie
Purple - My corned beef hash
Red – My knee caps
Blue - Your ‘My Little Pony’ collection
Yellow - My illegitimate child in Ghana
Orange - My Blink 182 cd
Pink – My salt beef bucket
None – My prized statue of Michael Jackson in the nude
Other - The elephant in the corner
6.What do you prefer to watch on TV?
Scrubs- ManO.C.- Emotional
One Tree Hill - Senile
Heroes- Frostbitten
Lost - High
Simpsons- Cowardly
The news - Scarred
American Idol - Masochistic
Family Guy - Open
Top Model - Middle-class
Annat -shamed
7.What mood are you in?
Happy - How awful you are
Sad - How boring you are
Bored - That I get turned on only by garbage men
Angry - That your smell makes me vomit
Depressed – That we’re related
Excited - That I may pee my pants
Nervous - The middle-east is planning their revenge on you
Worried - That your Ford sucks
Apathetic - That you need a sex-change
Ashamed - That I'm allergic to your earlobes
Cuddly - That Santa doesn't exsist
Silly - That there is no solution to you being a dumbkid
Other - That your driving sucks
8.What's the color of your walls in your bedroom?
White - Your toe ring
Yellow - Your love letters to me
Red - The pictures from Vegas
Black - Your pet rock
Blue - The couch cushions
Green - Your car
Orange - Your false teeth
Brown - Your nose hair clippers
Grey - Our matching snoopy underwear
Purple - Your old New Kids on the Block blanket
Pink - The cut toenails
Other - Your Hannah Montanna underwear
9.The first letter of your first name?
A/B - My virginity
C/D - Your photo with the moustache drawn on it
E/F - Your neighbour’s dog
G/H - The oil tank from your car
I/J - Your left ear
K/L - The results of that blood-sample
M/N - Your glass eye
O/P - My common sense
Q/R - Your mom
S/T - Your collection of butterflies
U/V - Your criminal record
W/X – Your sucide note
Y/Z - Your credit cardsYour collection of butterflies
10.The last letter in your last name?
A/B - Told my psychiatrist about the bruises
C/D - Always will remember the pep talks
E/F -Never will forget that night
G/H – Hate your cooking
I/J – Mocked you behind your back constantly
K/L - Will tell the authorities that you did not steal that whale in the back yard
M/N - Told in my confession today about the moose poaching
O/P - Was interviewed about the car you stole
Q/R - Always wanted to break your legs
S/T - Get sick when I think of your feet
U/V - Will try to forget that you broke my heart
W/X - Haven’t showered in a month
Y/Z - Will try to forget that you broke my heart
11.What do you prefer to drink?
Wine- Our friendship is ruined
Soft drink – I’m off to lead a new life as a lemon
mineral water – I will haunt you when I’m reincarnated as an Eskimo
Milk - The apartment building is on fire
Water – I'm scratching my ass as you read this
Cider– I have a passionate interest for mice
Juice – You ruined my attempts at another world war
sweet tea – You should get that embarrassing rash checked
Hot chocolate – Your Cucumber-fetishism is weird
Whiskey - I love Oprah Winfrey
Beer – Thanks for the Cocaine
Other – you should stop picking your nose
12. To which country would you prefer to go on a vacation?
Thailand – Warm tingly sensations
Australia - Best of luck on the sex change
France - Love always
Spain - With tears of sadness
China – You make me sick
Germany – Please don’t hurt me
Japan - Go milk a cow
Greece - Your everlasting enemy
USA - Greetings to your frog Leonard
Egypt – Kiss my butt
England - Go drown yourself

Thursday, October 1, 2009

Car talk...

On the way to daycare this morning, Juju and I had a very interesting conversation:

JUJU: Mommy, what dat mommy?

ME: (Luckily we were at a stop light so I could turn to see what he was referring to)
Thats a cemetary.

JUJU: What dat "cemterrry"?

ME: (Seriously?! Totally at a loss for words...)
When you die, thats where they put you. (I had no idea what to say can you tell?)

JUJU: Oh die.

ME: Do you know what that means? Die?

JUJU: The car and then hit my face, and then hit my leg, and then my face.

ME: Like if you get into a car accident...

(then I'm interrpted)

JUJU: And you DIE (said really loud and low) mommy.

ME: Its like this...when you get old, you eventually will die because (pause-then interrupted again)

JUJU: Cuz you no wake up. Cuz you hit yours face.

ME: Ok.

JUJU: the movie they crash and he hit his face and he DIE (said loud and low again) Daddy movie the man hit his face then he DIE (again said loud and low lol) more movie time with daddy. Well at least there's some kind of a basic concept there, right? I've asked big daddy what movie Juju was referring to, and all he could come up with is Transformers. Who knows.