Don't text-ask your husband what he's doing cuz u might get this

So I'm at work, about to clock back in from lunch and decide to text big daddy to see what him and the monsters were doing. THIS is what he replied with......

First of all, he coulda called me and TOLD me first before making my heart drop into my stomach. some men have no sense. At least mine doesn't when put in the middle of a "crisis." (ya that was his exact word..crisis...see...MEN LOL)
Apparently, Stanky was asleep in our bedroom and big daddy was doing something in the living room. Well Juju loves to "check" on his bubba to make sure he's ok, and then comes out and tells us that Stanky is "sweeeeeping." But this time Juju comes out of the room and tells big daddy that Stanky needed him right now. He gets up off the couch and is about to go into the room and is met at our bedroom door with THAT picture.
Of course he panics, because he has no idea what the fuck just happened. He said it was crazy because there was blood on the bed where he obviously laid his head down after he got hurt, but really nothing anywhere else. Of course there was some on his face and his arm and body, but it wasn't dripping everywhere. Big daddy thinks he may have rolled off the bed and hit the corner of my night stand.
It looks like it could be a deep gash, but we're just not sure. I know you're thinking well what the fuck do  you mean you're not sure...lol...but it's really crazy because its not even bleeding anymore. Big daddy said it was liked it stopped bleeding when he cleaned it the first time. I promise that if by tomorrow it doesn't look better or starts bleeding again, I WILL take him to the doctor. So for tonight he is under observation. His cut has been cleaned and liquid stitched. He has been given acetaminophen in case of pain, and is currently laying on my leg snoring his cute little butt off.

A moment of peace

Oh I love this little guy with every ounce of me but he is EVERYWHERE, ALL THE TIME. He's loud and in your face, and sometimes...sometimes...you, well I, just want to say sit yo crazy self down! But oh he's a sweetie. Especially during peaceful times such as these.

Get to know ME :)

*just wanted to add one thing I forgot*

Found an awesome meme that is absolutely perfect! So pull up your laptop/macbook/desktop keyboard, and enjoy a little bit of ME...

The questions...and my answers...

1. Do you have a fetish?
So um ya...fetish...no whips and chains. This may be TMI for some but I love the sluttly/hooker-ish looking "lingerie" hidden under regular clothes. :) On the non-sexual side...I DEFINITELY have a show fetish! I have 112 pairs to prove it!

2. Do you sing in the shower?
Yup! And unlike big daddy, I actually sing real songs. OK who am I kidding, I've been known to belt out itsy bitsy spider and twinkle twinkle little star like I'm Laurie Birkner or something. Oh and Disney movie songs like a whole new world. LOL.

3. Who was your first crush?
Let's see...famous person first was Chad Allen. You remember...from the show my 2 dads and then later on Dr. Quinn medicine woman. In real life, that would be Greg. It was 2nd grade. We were born on the same day and everything. Our parents always joked we would be boyfriend and girlfriend lol.

4. What do you think is the best manly trait a guy could have?
Broad shoulders, defined chest and abs, and guns! Yummy yum yum!

5. Do you sleep naked?
I have before, but get cold. The only time that ever happens now is, well, you know...after nookie. And then I still get cold and end up with at least underwear on. But then there was this one time, kids were with VonTrapp and I got pretty, whats the word...oh ya SMASHED! Well needless to say, after the nookie I passed out and just never woke up till the morning. OK, really TMI that time.

6. What do you do when (you think) no one is looking?
Pull out a wedgie.

7. What's the first thing you do when you go online?
Check email.

8. Summer is.....?
SUN!!!!


So now that you know a lot more about me :) join in on the fun and link up! Hurry on over to Mannland5 NOW. 

Oh what I would give to be a boy RIGHT NOW!

I know you're thinking, WTF, but seriously. Its pretty humid today in the lone star state. Well at least here in Austin. Now mind you, it is NOT and I repeat NOT as humid as it is in Shreveport. Anyways...we went to the mall which was cool. I mean even the drive wasn't too bad. Big daddy has an Amigo and we can pull the top down like a jeep. But when we came out of the mall, WOW. I don't know what happened. Walking to the truck was not fun with 2 sticky little guys. We put the top back up because the sun was just beaming too, but boy I think that was a bad idea. LOL. We had the air on and everything but those sweaty little monsters were just uncomfortable. They were tired and thirsty and whiny. Oh were they whiny! We finally made it home and they did a dash for the front door as soon as we let them out the car.
I had left my house key, so we had to wait for big daddy to unload the truck before opening the door. AHHHHHHH....sweet air condition. The door hadn't even closed all the way and the monsters were already stripped down to a diaper and underwear. I turn around and big daddy is already in his boxers sprawled out on the couch. I have a dress on and all I can do is go in our room and "fan" myself with it. Ladies you know what I mean. Ugggghhhhh.

FQF (cuz I'm cool and like to abbrev.)

So this is my first time playing...YAY! (*in my UFC ref voice*) Let's get it on! Here are the 5 questions for today (with my answers)...

1. Do you have an iPhone and, if so, how do you get apps and what are your favorites?
Don't have an iPhone (though I wish I did). I do have a Blackberry Storm. I have TONS of apps: UberTwitter, facebook, bb messenger, weather eye, skype, myspace, bankof america, flickr, youtube, poynt--->those are my faves. :)

2. What is your fondest memory of K-3rd grade?
School plays, choir, and CHEERLEADING!!!


3. What makes you cringe at the thought of touching?
Ok...so y'all are gonna think I'm uber crazy! But gravy. EEEEWWWWW. I just get goosebumps thinking about it. I will not touch it. Ever. I don't even make it. I'll eat it...with other food of course not by itself. Oh and it has to be white gravy if I eat it. Brown gravy, yuck!
And like Mama M, vomit. I mean, no one likes touching vomit though right?


4. If you could have any celebrity show up on your doorstep who would it be and why?
2 words: VIN DIESEL. That is all.


5. What would you say is your best physical feature?
So I think I have nice full lips. Not too full...just right. Oh and I love my legs. I thank cheerleading everyday for my toned legs.
So that was actually really fun. Except now I'm thinkin bout gravy....
Come play and link up with the rest of us. Cuz, you know, we all jump off a bridge together LOL.

P.S.A.

Even after you had a grueling workout, and you smell worse than your husbands arm pit after a whole day of sweating in the 90 degree Texas sun...even though you sweated so much you could fill and entire baby pool of it, do you ever, EVER take a shower while 1: you are running the dishwasher, 2: you are washing a load of whites, and 3: you are drying a queen sized comforter....all at the same time. Cuz guess what?! There will be, well actually there will NOT be...I remind you NOT be...any hot water whatsoever!
What in the hell was I thinking?

I can't believe I found this!

This me and big daddy's wedding song. There's no video, just the song.

Dinner at Buffalo Wild Wings

Ya...I don't know either...

"Mommy, you a boy"

So Juju and I were watching Thomas the Train on DVD and looking through a magazine yesterday. I think I was looking through my Oxygen magazine.

ME: Juju, is this a boy or a girl? (pointing to some chick in an ad)
JUJU: Girl.
ME: Is this a boy or a girl? (pointing to a dude standing behind, and gawking at the girl in the ad)
JUJU: Boy.
ME: Are you a boy or a girl?
JUJU: Ima boy. Silly mommy.
ME: What about Stanky?
JUJU: Him a boy too.
ME: What about daddy?
JUJU: Daddy a boy mommy duh.
ME: What about Skinny and Milkshake?
JUJU: Dey my bubbas. Dem boys too.
ME: What about mommy?
JUJU: Mommy you a boy.
ME: No. Mommy's a girl remember?
JUJU: No mommy you a boy.
ME: Why is mommy a boy?
JUJU: We play outside wit da mud. And you work out. And you build cages. And you play cars. And we play guns. Das what boys do mommy. So you a boy duh.

Well I was told wasn't I? LOL.

"My boo-yo no more hurt mommy"

This is a Sponsored Post written by me on behalf of Boudreaux's Butt Paste. All opinions are 100% mine.


It has been, well it still actually IS, truly an experience trying to potty train Stanky. He tells us he has to go pee, but does it in his diaper anyway. Then we had a set back...diarrhea. And then came...DIAPER RASH. Uggghhhh. 2 years old and diaper rash. The last time I remember him having a rash was when he first started walking. Poor little guy. He was walking funny and kept saying how much "in my die-pa hurt me mommy."
I HATE diaper rash cream. Especially because everything I ever tried just never really seems to work, and it smells soooo awful. So I made a call to a friend back in Louisiana...Boudreaux's Butt Paste
. Seriously? Butt paste? Butt paste. I've heard of it, but never did try it. Basically I just assumed it was like all the other diaper creams out there: smelly more than anything, sticky, and hard to wipe off. Boy was I wrong. So on the recommendation of damn near all the moms I knew in Shreveport, there I was buying Boudreaux's Butt Paste for my 2 year old. First thing, wow, there was no awful zinc smell, and secondly, it was easy to apply, and at the next diaper change (blah) it was easy to wipe off so I could reapply a "fresh coat." LOL. In just 24 hours, his little red "boo-yo" wasn't so red anymore. I have never seen anything so gentle work so well. AND it didn't smell bad. SWEET! Two days later, after a fresh diaper change, Stanky stands up and before he puts his shorts back on, those words come out of his mouth: "My boo-yo no more hurt mommy." YES!! Even though the rash is gone, I still use it to prevent another rash from appearing again. Especially since there are still going to be a few more days of pee filled diapers. Hopefully not months.
So here's a quick run down:
Boudreaux's Butt Paste spreads on easily, cleans off quickly, and has a pleasant scent. It's a diaper rash ointment, skin protectant, helps to prevent diaper rash, protects chafed skin, and seals out wetness. Available in convenient foil pack, 1oz, 2oz, 3oz, 4 oz tubes and 16oz jar. Available in drug, discount or grocery store chains nationwide. 
And aside from all that, its FAMOUS. Its been featured on 
• Oprah Show 
• Tonight Show 
• Today Show 
• People Magazine 
• ESPN 
• While You Were Out TLC
Still not a believer? Are you kidding me? :) But seriously...Wanna see the sweetness for your self? Follow this link to learn more about Boudreaux's and to also get a free sample: http://www.blairex.com/BLButtPaste.php 

She says...I say...

So I came across this cool meme from Unconscious Mutterings via the Misplaced Midwesterner. Basically its this: She "says" a word and you reply with the first thing that comes to your head. So lets get My brain going...

1. Creepy ::  crawlies (is that a word? )
2. Links :: to twitter
3. Sane :: insane
4. Bun :: in the oven 
5. Visual :: effects 
6. Remote :: control 
7. Freaking :: AWESOME! 
8. Curly :: fries 
9. Saga :: drama
10. Different ::  strokes