Dear Walmart sugar cookies,
I would like to start off with this...HOW DARE YOU?! Yes I said it and I'll say it again, HOW DARE YOU?! What you ask. Oh the ever so blatant sarcasm you seep. How dare you sit on that shelf staring at me, taunting me. You know exactly what you're doing! How can you just sit there so spring colored, and moist, pointing your little star shape at me while I walk by. You KNOW how hard I've been working out. You KNOW the food sacrafices I have made over the past couple months. But there you are...teasing me, laughing to yourself. Calling out my name was just plain cruel! How could you? After all this time, I thought we had an understanding. You were going to let me do my thing and patiently wait for me. But NOOOOOO...you had to go and doll yourself up with those spinkles. For Easter you say? HA! I know your scheming ways. Are you going to explain to my husband what you are doing in my house? No I have to. Just know that you and all your taunting deserve to get whats coming to you!
You're number 1 fan!